How To Be A Better LGBTQAI+ Ally
By Jackie Marschall
Perhaps 2020 is the year of the “Wakeup call” where we are realizing that it’s time for us to step up and challenge ourselves to understand the people around us more deeply and to just simply be better humans. This year, in June, 2020, I wanted to highlight a few key factors in what I think is necessary to be a better LGBTQAI+ ally.
One thing I think a lot of us are realizing is that there is a lot that we don’t know and there is a lot that we weren’t taught. We learned history, but only one side of it. This has resulted in many of us taking extra time to catch up on the history that we didn’t learn. That being said, it’s time to start holding ourselves accountable to being informed.We have endless information at our fingertips, now we need to use it.
Let’s start here:
On June 15, 2020, the Supreme Court ruled that section 7 of the Civil Rights Act protects LGBTQ individuals from workplace discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation and gender identity. Until this date, it was legal in more than half of the states to fire workers for being gay, bisexual or transgender. This is a HUGE win for the LGBTQ community!
https://www.npr.org/2020/06/15/863498848/supreme-court-delivers-major-victory-to-lgbtq-employees
Netflix documentary’s that you need to add to your list:
“The Death and Life of Marsha P. Johnson.” – Marsha P. Johnson was a Black Trans woman/activist/queen who played one of the most central roles in the 1969 Stonewall Uprising, which was a 3 day riot against police brutality and also the reason why we have a Pride month today. Marsha P. Johnson is one of the most influential activists in the Gay/Trans rights movement and someone we should all have a history lesson on.
“Disclosure” – A documentary about how the media has portrayed trans individuals throughout history and the influence that has had on society.
Being informed also means knowing not only WHO you are voting for, but WHAT.
We know how important voting is, but voting for individuals that take rights and protections away from LGBTQ individuals can be extremely harmful to their overall wellbeing of life. For example:
On June 12, 2020 The Trump Administration finalized a rule that would remove nondiscrimination protections for LGBTQ people when it comes to health careand health insurance. That means that a transgender person could be denied care for a checkup at the doctor’s office – during a global pandemic.
This is just one policy of course, but staying informed on a state and local level is extremely important because those policies and politicians can dramatically harm your neighbors.
Working to be a better ally means learning and respecting the use of pronouns.Asking someone’s pronouns may seem uncomfortable and weird at first, but to a Queer person, it shows respect and also that you could potentially be a safe space.
Asking someone’s pronouns means that you respecting one’s true identity and working to better understand them as a whole. Misgendering someone is never fun, but it will happen. Listen, learn, make the change, and move forward.
Most importantly, remember that each and every experience is different and equally as valid. Gender and sexuality do not have to be put into a box and defined. Our gender norms CAN change. The bottom line is that you must believe that all people, regardless of gender identity and sexual orientation, deserve dignity and respect.
Being an ally also means, speak up! I think at this point in 2020, with the height of the BLM movement, many of us are realizing the repercussions of being silent. It’s time to get comfortable being uncomfortablebecause change can be uncomfortable and necessary at the same time. Conversations may be difficult, but they are necessary. Remember that things are only uncomfortable until they’re not and it’s important to use inclusive language in everyday dialogue in order for it to become a normal part of conversation.
It’s 2020 and the trans community needs us know more than ever. The trans community is struggling and it’s time that we create spaces and uplift those voices in our community. It is time that we SEE these human beings as their true selves in society. We have to open up our spaces and give them the opportunity to thrive.
Below is a situation that happened right here in our community, not even a month ago.
On June 9th, a black trans woman was murdered in Liberty Township. The Butler County Sheriff’s Office repeatedly deadnamed Riah Milton. Deadnaming is the use of a birth name of a transgender person without their consent. The sheriff’s dept. learned about the correction and continued to use her birth name as well as he/him pronouns. When asked if this was a hate crime, they said no.
Trans folx continue to be discriminated against, attacked, and often times, killed for simply just existing.
All of that being said, it’s all about loving each other at the end of the day. Loving each other and changing your mindset to being open to different things.
As we become a more informed society, we should simultaneously become a more inclusive society. If we’re truly taking what we are learning and putting it into better practice.
It’s time to start holding ourselves accountable to being informed. Respect individuals for who they are and how they see themselves. Normalize pronouns, know who and what you’re voting for and empower trans women and men any moment you can.