Intentionally Slowing Down – Ashley’s Storyd
Ashley Vincent, The Christ Hospital RN and her son, Everett.
Embracing a different pace of life is a big take-away for Ashley following the first half of 2020. “Women have so much pressure to be great at everything,” says Ashley Vincent, RN on 2 South at The Christ Hospital. “We wear so many different hats, and believe we are supposed the be the best mom, best wife, best homemaker. This slower-paced life during the pandemic has been so life-giving for me in many ways. I want to stay committed to this slower-living lifestyle.”
Ashley and her husband Justin are parents to Everett, a busy two-year-old who was involved in lots of activities prior to the pandemic. Ashley says she put a lot of focus on getting Everett involved in every opportunity for socialization and fun toddler activities. “We did swim classes, toddler learning groups, story times at the libraries and bookstores, music class,” she says. “While they are all good things, I was putting unnecessary stress on myself. We would spend most of the day doing those activities, and I think it was a little too much stimulation for him too.
“Working full-time, managing the family and household and – oh, and all while staying in shape – can become burdensome, especially if you have a perfectionist mentality like me. My husband is awesome and does a lot, but he also was working full-time prior to the pandemic, and usually is in school full-time. When he was temporarily furloughed, he used that extra time to study and take care of our son, helping us keep our distance with my mom, who usually cares for Everett when I’m working.”
Ashley’s family not only had a different pace of activity when adapting to COVID, but also changed how they connected with extended family. While the distancing was especially hard at first, she and Justin remained flexible, using Facebook Messenger for larger group videos, and a gaming app called HouseParty that allows participants to video chat and play games. Ashley describes herself as an introvert at heart, so many of her routine solo activities such as writing, hiking, music, painting and dance were still available to her, but being unable to help one of her closest friends prepare for a new baby has been difficult.
When asked what she may have done differently to adjust, Ashley says, “The greatest mind shift has been a focus on my mental and emotional health. In one of The Christ Hospital Health Network’s COVID19 Newsletter Updates back in April, LifeMatters Counseling services was offered to Christ Hospital Employees, and I decided to take a chance and try it out. It couldn't have come at a better time and was a huge help for me. I highly recommend it to anyone feeling the extra weight of the world at this time."
Ashley adds that overall, she has learned a TON through the COVID process. “Being forced to slow down made me realize a slower lifestyle is just as fulfilling to my family.
“I know once things start to ‘normalize’ I’m probably going to feel the push to get back to my previous level of busy, to give into the pressure to perform, to be this superstar full-time working mom. It’s going to take strength to create boundaries and protect what is truly important in life. I look at it now as having a blank slate, and I’m being very intentional about what I’m adding back.”